'Twas the Night Before Surgery...

‘Twas the night before surgery 

and all through the house

I was frantically cleaning, even ironed my blouse

The cupboards were empty, the shelves, they were bare

There was nothing but soup and protein shakes there.

My family was nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of new life danced in my head

I packed my PJ’s, the ones with the snap

And laid my head down for a short, little nap.

Before I knew it, the alarm night did shatter

I jumped up knowing I would never be fatter.

As I walked out the door, I tossed my last “stash”

And away to the hospital we flew like a flash.

They prepped me and poked me, to sleep I did go

I knew all was well, such care they did show.

When I was awakened, but who should appear?

The surgeon, the nurse and nutritionist dear.

They gave me a cup and a pink swabbie stick

If I did more than sip, I would surely be sick.

More rapid than eagles, my courses they came

The message was clear, this is no game.

“No sodas! No solids! The protein must mix in

Four weeks from now, purees you’ll be fixin’”

And now down to x-ray! Oh, what a ball!

Now drink it down! Drink it down! Drink it down all!

Then like a hurricane, my time it did fly

The discharge nurse said a fond “good-bye.”

So, into my brave new world I flew

With heart full of hope for my life anew.

I mixed and I measured, looking for proof

That this huge decision had not been a goof.

Then one happy day the scale turned around

The weight begin falling, it fell with a bound.

I became overjoyed from my head to my foot

Bought brand new clothes, and spent lots of loot.

All my old “fat” clothes in a box I did pack

Off to the Goodwill with the sack on my back.

My eyes – how they twinkled, my soul it was merry!

My husband sent roses. He was pleased, very!

And now, my new tool I have gotten to know

My spirits have risen from depths oh so low

I live from above and not from beneath

Support, love and joy the team does bequeath

I never thought possible, losing my belly

(Although it still shakes like a bowlful of jelly)

My dreams are no longer on the back shelf

I can stand quite tall and be proud of myself

With confidence now, there is nothing to dread

Life is a joy, it is full steam ahead

As I was told, this new way is work

I make the choice, the rules I won’t shirk

There’s no way to say as I end this prose

How happy I am, how much my peace grows

I skip and I sing, and sometime I whistle

My spirits soar high, like the down of a thistle

And so I will close with not one ounce of strife:

“Good health to all, and to all a long life!”

Julie Dostal 12/22/05

Adapted from The Night Before Christmas

By Clement Clarke Moore